- u get horny over fucking everything
- you fucking ruin your panties
- what the hell
- people just fucking stop
- this list is fucking awful
ONE WATERMELON FRESH FROM THE MANURE FIELD YOUR SPOOKYNESS
I was trying to explain to my grandma what being bisexual meant and saying that I looked at ladies butts and she was all
"You’re not GAY everyone checks out ladies rear ends" and my sister was like "I have never wanted to look at a ladies butt"
Later my grandma called me and was like “I THINK I MIGHT BE A LITTLE GAY”
BEST GRANDMA STORY
PLATFORM 9, PLATFORM 10. Nothing in between.
Excuse me sir, can you tell me how to get to platform nine and three quarters?
Platform 9 and 3 quarters, there ain’t no such thing. You’re the 700th kid to ask me that today. I still refuse to believe that it exists.
Eventually we’re just gonna have to accept “ducking” as a swear word
Words. To. Live. By.